For $5,000 and a month’s supply of veggie burgers, Octomom Nadya Suleman has signed on as PETA’s newest spokesperson for their “Spay & Neuter Campaign.”
Every year seven million dogs and cats enter shelters where more than half are put to death, so if this unlikely example of planned parenthood can get people thinking about nipping those nuts and tying those tubes, good choice PETA!
Along these lines, other interesting pairings might include:
Jeffrey Dahmer for “Vegetarian Times.”
Jesse James for the “Boy Scouts of
Sarah Palin for the “American Library Association.”
Feel free to toss in your own.
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… where anyone of a color lacking the pink hue and not carrying papers to prove their legal status can be subject to arbitrary detainment has claimed another victim.
Yes, Dora the Explorer’s little brown ass has been busted for illegal border crossing and resisting arrest. As police cuffed and dragged her away, Dora was heard to cry out, “But I’m a celebrity. Get me out of here.”
Meanwhile, prices of produce are expected to skyrocket as fruits and vegetables rot in fields where white hands fear to tread.
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Posters like this will soon be popping up all over Barcelona:
In an attempt to convince tourists to confine their bikini-wearing to the beach, authorities in the seaside town said to be fed up with visitors roaming the streets in their swim wear have launched a campaign to discourage the practice. “We just don’t think it’s civil.”
We have to wonder what they’d think of “The Naked Office,” a new British reality series which attempts to prove the premise that workplace nudity decreases stress and improves productivity. According to the host, “For most people, going to work in the nude is a very daunting prospect, and I believe this extreme process will help them push their boundaries and become a close team that trusts each other enough to get naked together.”
Not advised for Sushi chefs.
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Kentucky Tea Party candidate for Senate Rand Paul seemed anxious to tout his conservative credentials when he hit the talk show circuit this week, but may only have succeeded in shining a spotlight on his more contentious views:
Private businesses shouldn't be forced to abide by 1964 Civil Rights Act.
- Step away from that lunch counter, boy.
Presidents Obama’s “anti-business” handling of the BP oil spill is un-American.
- Because what is “American” is letting the taxpayers get stuck with the bill.
And as for the mining accident in
- Hey, there are more miners where they came from. Get over it.
Behind the scenes, some of his GOP colleagues are said to be longing for the good ol’ days when their candidates just claimed to see
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Happy Birthday
Still one of the most original rock divas of all time, Cher turned 64 this week.
Where were you when Cher was singing this song?
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Finally…
Cost of cleaning up BP’s mess in the Gulf: $542 million and counting. BP makes over $3.9 million every hour. In the weeks since the rig exploded, they've earned over $2.8 billion. Yes, that’s billion – with “B”.
So why do a group of Republicans led by Alaska Senator Lisa Murkowski want the company to pay for only the first five days of the cleanup and put taxpayers on the hook for everything else?
Yeah. I’d like an answer to that, too.
Ah, yes… If we could just turn back time.