This week, dear readers, you get to vote for the winner of our very first “Steaming Pile of Shit” Award…
Proving it’s never a good idea to piss off someone who has nothing to lose…
This week Tiger’s porn star mistress Joselyn James was back in the news. Remember her? She’s the one who, with media whore attorney Gloria Allred at her side, sobbed that all she wanted from Tiger was an apology. Yeah, I’m thinkin’ maybe he should have just given her one. Ms. James has now released 100 salacious sex texts sent to her by Woods and promises more on the way. The texts mention everything from slap-and-tickle, “You are my fucking whore. Hold you down while I choke you” (Now what woman could resist sweet talk like that?) to slap-and piddle, “Have you ever had a golden shower done to you?”
Pundits say that once Tiger is back on the links and winning again the “United States of Amnesia” will forgive and forget.
I say, Tiger, you’re a steaming pile of shit.
###
John Edwards’ mistress and baby mama, Rielle Hunter, posed pantiless in her tell-all interview with GQ Magazine this month…
Then was outraged that when given the choice of crotch shots or head shots the men’s magazine chose the former. I know, Rielle. I’m stunned, too. In the interview, Ms. Hunter goes on to say, “Most of ‘Johnny’s’ errors in judgment (I just love that phrase) were because of his fear of the wrath of Elizabeth . He was emasculated.”
Oh, yeah. Let’s blame the cancer-stricken wife.
Rielle, you’re a steaming pile of shit.
###
Giving the saying, “A leopard doesn’t change his spots” a whole new meaning…
News surfaced this week that Sandra Bullock’s tattoo-covered, chop-shop-owning husband, aptly named Jesse James, has strayed. Upon accepting this year’s Golden Globe Award, Bullock thanked her husband, saying that she's able to do the quality of work she’s doing now because “she never had anyone have her back before.” Seems it was what he was doing behind her back with this classy babe, Michelle “Bombshell” McGee, for the last – count ‘em – 11 months that’s now front and center.
On Thursday James issued a statement apologizing to Sandra and his family, citing the much overused excuse of “poor judgment.” Really? That’s all it was? Poor judgment is when you pick up a hitchhiker who ends up stealing your car. Or when you win the lottery, but neglect to report it to the IRS. That’s poor judgment.
Screwing around on your wife with a stripper whose nickname is “bombshell” for 11 months? No – you and your brethren of cheaters don’t get off so easy.
Jesse, you’re a steaming pile of shit.
###
Lt. Dan Choi, who will be discharged from the military under 'Don't Ask, Don't Tell' since it has been revealed that he is gay, chained himself to the White House gate in a protest of the military policy.
Homophobes claim that the military and, by extension, our national security will be irreparably damaged if gays are allowed to serve openly. Really? Considers these facts:
Over 50 gay military Arab linguists have been discharged under the DADT policy. Back in 2007, Democratic Rep. Marty Meehan had this to say: “At a time when our military is stretched to the limit and our cultural knowledge of the
That’s right folks. You may be able to torture the guy to get information out of him, but you can’t make him give it to you in English.
Morons.
###
Sarah Palin took on Florida Democratic Rep. Alan Grayson last week and the final score was a predictable Palin (0)…
Appearing at a rally in Florida to urge voters to oust Grayson, Palin came out swinging with this shot: “Piper is with me tonight so I won’t say anything that can’t be said in front of children” and then ended the event with her recipe for moose face pie.
In response, Grayson praised Palin for having a hand large enough to fit his entire name on and added that she deserved credit for getting through the entire hour-long program without quitting. “I look forward to an honest debate with Governor Palin on the issues in the unlikely event that she ever learns anything about them”
Oh, snap!
###
On Thursday, the Congressional Budget Office found that the final health care legislation would cut the federal deficit by more than $100 billion over the first 10 years and that the overhaul would go on to cut the deficit by more than $1 trillion over the subsequent decade.
As you can imagine, this is driving the right bat-shit crazy.
Meanwhile, insurance gargantuan Cigna awarded $120 million to two – yes, that’s right – two of its executives in compensations packages while fighting health care reform for the rest of us citing that, if passed, it would “adversely affect Cigna’s bottom line.”
Cigna, you're a steaming pile of shit.
Cigna, you're a steaming pile of shit.
How about we all get together and try to do what’s right for the millions of people in need of affordable health care in this country and stop sucking at the tit of the insurance industry lobbyists? That goes for both parties.
Okay. I’m done now. The floor is all yours…