I suppose it was selfish of me to hope that with the election over we could all slide into a period of well-earned calm and enjoy the approaching holiday season with only stories of PETA turkey protests and the occasional drunken Santa to mar our peace.
Alas…
What would the 24-hour news cycle do if powerful
white guys ever started keeping their pants zipped? There’s a whole industry of people who could
be thrown out of work without the dependability of a good sex scandal at least
once a year. Hard to believe it’s been
over a year since Weiner-gate, isn’t it?
The players…
 |
| The General |
 |
| The Wife |
 |
| The Babe |
 |
| The Other General |
 |
| Creepy FBI Dude |
 |
| The Other Babe |
And as long as we’re speaking of a woman scored,
remember Mother Nature? The gal who let
loose with some major whup-ass on the east coast?
 |
| AP Photo/Julio Cortez |
Sadly, Sandy seems to have already taken a
back seat to our insatiable appetite for shiny new objects.
***
Meanwhile, John McCain…
… is vowing to block the appointment of Oxford
educated-Rhodes Scholar U.N. Ambassador Susan Rice for the job of Secretary of
State, accusing the ambassador of lying about the Benghazi attack…
On Wednesday, McCain skipped out on an intelligence
briefing on the details of the Benghazi investigation to instead hold a press conference – to blast the administration about the lack of
intelligence briefings on the details of the Benghazi investigation.
Get the net.
***
Mitt Romney finally figured out why he lost the
election…
Eager to share his insights with donors on a conference call – and apparently
still unaware of the invention of recording devices – Romney whined that it
wasn’t his fault. President Obama gave “gifts”
to all his voting constituencies and that’s the only reason he won.
Yes. If
only his billionaire donors had possessed the foresight to send us all new cars,
Romney could have sewn this thing up.
To their credit, every Republican politician who
hopes to run for any office ever again stated emphatically that Romney’s comments
only served to dig the party further into the shit-hole of irrelevance and suggesting…
***
Toodaloo Twinkies…
Hostess announced that after years of losing
market share in the junk food industry the company is closing its doors, but
not before blaming those big, bad unions for its financial woes. It would seem, however, that there is plenty
of blame to go around.
The company, which first filed bankruptcy in 2004,
has been controlled by a group of Wall Street “restructuring” investment firms
for the past eight years that, while squeezing concessions from workers,
rewarded its CEOs, who had no bakery or food industry experience whatsoever,
with fat compensation.
Twinkies could be back though if another company
buys the brand during the sell-off of the company’s assets.
Personally, I will miss the Hostess Lemon fruit
pie. Yum.
What’s your guilty Hostess pleasure?
***
And finally,
“Dump the Donald…?
Macy’s is standing by Donald Trump despite an
online petition that has amassed over 600,000 signatures asking the company to dump
Donald’s line of men’s clothing due to his "especially
unpleasant, nasty and despicable behavior" such as "personally
attacking women" he disagrees with, denying climate change, continuing the
"birther" conspiracy against President Obama.
I disagree.
We have freedom of expression in this country that protects even
douchebags. If you don’t want his
product line to succeed, don’t buy it.
On the other hand, I completely agree with Chelsea
Handler’s take on the issue…
Well, that was fun.
