Rockin’ the Grammy Red Carpet…
Best: Kelly
Rowland shows how it’s done.
Worst:
Adele. Ozzy Osbourne
called. He wants his drapes back.
Honorable Mention: Katy Perry, whose "accessories" earned a vote of
appreciation from Ellen.
***
Carnival Cruise ship “Triumph” is anything but…
After a week adrift at sea, its hull hung in
shame, the ship was at last tugged ashore in Alabama. The final insult – a choice between a
sewage-filled floating hell hole with only ketchup sandwiches for sustenance…
and Alabama. Because clearly the 4,000
passengers had not yet suffered enough.
Lured by the promise of luxury ocean-view suites…
Passengers instead found themselves enjoying
fun-filled slumber parties with their neighbors…
Frankly, the appeal of boarding a 14-story floating building and setting out to sea with the population of a
small city eludes me. I go on vacation
to get away from crowds.
At least the tortured travelers were quickly put
on buses out of Alabama before they could be held hostage for breeding
purposes.
***
This week saw the burial of…….
ex-Navy SEAL and renown assassin, Chris Kyle. Kyle, author of “American Sniper” was, ironically,
himself shot to death by an Iraqi war veteran who he had taken to a shooting
range and given a loaded semi-automatic rifle in some kind of attempt to help
the veteran deal with his PTSD… What
could possibly go wrong?
The next time some married politician gets caught
with his key in another woman’s lock and tries to pass it off as “bad judgment”
let’s refer him to this guy.
While my condolences go out to Kyle’s family, and
I truly do not find the incident funny in any way, good God Almighty. Doesn’t anyone think anything through
anymore?
***
Speaking of guns…
How’s this for more bang for your buck?
 |
| Photo: Eurthisnthat.com |
With every Valentine purchase of $1500 or
more, a North Carolina jewelry store owner offered a coupon for a free shotgun at
the local gun shop, saying he thought it would be a "fun" idea.
The response was mixed along gender lines, with
women generally saying it was, at the very least, bad timing given the recent horror
of the Sandy Hook massacre.
To all the men thinking this mix of bling and
bullets was a great deal, you’d better hope your lady love agrees, lest she
grab that new shotgun and blow off your family jewels.
***
President Obama gave his State of the Union Speech
this week…
While Marco Rubio became the Poland Spring Water
poster boy…
Rubio, the “rising star” and last ditch hope for
the future of the “Got Old People?” party was just the latest to crash and burn
while attempting the truly thankless gig of giving a rebuttal to an Obama SOTU
speech. Surprisingly uncomfortable and
sweating bullets from his opening remarks, Rubio, in the gulp heard around the
world, then truly took a dive and the rest is comic history…
Meanwhile, somewhere in Louisiana Bobby Jindal
fell to his knees and kissed the ground in thanks to Rubio for finally
obliterating in the public memory his own pathetic rebuttal attempt.
And may I just say, Rubio/Jindal ’16.
***
Oh, yeah… and the Pope quit.
