Tuesday, February 22, 2011

injaynesworld we "Bemoan Our Blemishes..."


Because apparently, it’s not bad enough that the gray is starting to creep in, the hearing is going, I can’t see worth crap, my bladder has a mind of its own. and I have brittle bones.  Now I’ve gotta have zits, too?   Really, God?

Yes, folks, geriatric acne has befallen me.

I knew I’d be punished for flaunting my California sun and size 4 ass over at Cardio Girl’s today, but I didn’t know it would be so immediate.   Instant karma’s a bitch.

They – oh, yes, “they” – couldn’t pop out on my forehead where they could be concealed by well-placed bangs.  No.  “Thelma” and “Louise” had to make their debut front and center on the end of my chin.   It’s a shame those depilatories worked so well.  I could have hidden them in my beard.  

It’s been years since I bought a tube of Clearasil.   Do they even still make it?   

Katy Perry is touting a product called “Proactiv” and had I been proactive, I might not have this problem, but who the hell knew.   

I really thought I’d seen the last of zits when I chucked that final box of tampons oh-those-many-years ago.   There are certain perks that come with age and no longer being called “crater face” is supposed to be one of them.  

With so many of my peers suffering real health problems, I know I shouldn’t bitch.  Knock on wood, I’ve been blessed with great health for which I’m truly grateful.   My hope is to just gradually wear out without a lot of fuss when my time comes.   I just hope that time doesn’t happen to come this week.  

“She died with two enormous zits on her chin,” is not how I’d like to be remembered. 

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